By Tod Creneti
If you were to wander onto the practice field at Saint Stephen’s where I coach high school football, there are any number of phrases you might hear that, without some context, make absolutely no sense. Coaches are often chided for being heavy on clichés and occasionally rough in our delivery. In reality, good coaches find ways to communicate complex concepts, often in the simplest terms possible. Throw in the fact that those listening most likely receive information in a unique manner, and you have a high-level challenge being met by coaches on a daily basis.
Two years ago, a coach joined our staff and made an immediate impact. One of the first days he joined us on the field he used a term that had fallen out of my coaching vocabulary. When I heard it, I was reminded of what a powerful tool it could be. As this coach watched a play unfold, he realized our quarterback threw a ball to a receiver without understanding who the receiver was, and the throw was too far for the receiver to catch. Quickly, almost as a reflex, he called out to our quarterback, “KYP!” I chuckled, told him that was a great reminder, but explained he would have to spell out that term for our quarterback who had no idea what he meant.
While there are a couple potential lessons in this example about clear communication, I want to focus on how valuable the concept of KYP is. If you don’t know what it means, you have probably guessed it is an acronym. KYP stands for Know Your Personnel. In the case of our quarterback, he had been throwing with a group of much faster receivers and when he threw to a slower receiver, he forgot to allow for the difference in speed and wildly missed his target. On a high school playing field, KYP serves as a reminder to be aware of who you are interacting with in a given moment. Off the field, it may hold even greater power.
Many of us are creatures of habit. We like to get up, drink our coffee, exercise, read something and even interact with others on a very regular schedule. Our schedules become important to us and we feel best when we are on pace to keep that schedule throughout the day. What can often be missed is, other people have schedules too, and theirs may not always mesh with ours. But, our schedules are just one of the ways our preferences inform how we work, live, and even play.
If we believe that KYP is an important concept at work, at home, or in any culture we value, we have to take a hard look at what is being said. Know Your Personnel speaks directly to the social-awareness pillar of emotional intelligence. If we KNOW the people around us, we can anticipate how they will handle success, failure, disappointment, or even an unexpected turn of events. Armed with a sense of how others function, we can choose to communicate with them in a way they absorb information best. While this seems perfectly reasonable and like a definite best practice, the challenge is clear. When those around us are under duress, we quite likely are too. In those moments of high stress, we prefer what feels best for us and think less about what would help those around us manage. Not unlike our preference for our own daily schedule, we prefer our “go to” emotional routine as well. The result? We treat those around us as if they should just get in line with our feelings and function how we wish they would.
There may be no greater feeling than to be known, truly known, by someone who is in a leadership role above us or a collaborator. Whether we are talking about a parent, or a co-worker to whom we report, when we feel known, we feel more at ease and find it easier to trust their thought process and ultimately, their decisions. Knowing people around us takes work. It requires that we invest in the development of relationships and it then asks that we think about how the other person will respond to whatever we are about to do or say. If we are truly committed to the success and performance of others, this is work well worth doing. People who feel known, appreciated for who they are and what they bring to the table, function at a higher level and experience less stress.
If our goal is success on a playing field, being an effective parent, or leading a company to heights unseen, KYP is a tool worth using. A focus on truly knowing others tells them they matter, it demonstrates that their skill sets are valued, and reinforces that we want to do all we can to see them perform at the highest possible level. The other great benefit is this: When we model the importance of knowing others, they are more likely to seek to know us. That means those around us will work harder to make sure we have what we need to excel and will be more likely to communicate in way that makes sense to us. If knowing others takes work, then being known requires equal amounts of trust. Yet, while allowing ourselves to be known feels risky, the resulting trust becomes the foundation of our relationships. To know and be known, is to trust and to grow.
In the end, we are building teams every time we find ourselves working together, whether at our jobs, or elsewhere. Let us examine how well we know those we find ourselves alongside every day and see how well we are known. Commit to finding ways, on a regular basis, to know those around you better and to make yourself better known. Make an effort to build trust in all that you do and act in a way that draws the trust of others. And, the next time you hear someone say KYP, find confidence in the knowledge that you do.
Tod Creneti has been the Falcons’ head football coach since 2011 and led SSES to independent state championships in 2016 and 2017. This blog post was originally published at: https://www.foundationcoachingus.com/blog
Hannah Sage, a 2016 Saint Stephen’s graduate and current UCF student, will appear on the annual Jeopardy! College Championship Tournament airing nationwide April 9-20. Hannah was a National Merit Scholar and a member of the academic team at SSES. She was one of five Saint Stephen’s students on the six-member Manatee County team that won the 2016 Florida Commissioner’s Academic Challenge.
Contestants in the Jeopardy! tournament are full-time undergraduate college students with no prior degrees. The tournament began during the popular quiz show’s 1988-89 season. The College Championship uses a 10-game format: 15 players, in groups of three, play in five quarterfinal games; the winners of those five games and the four highest-scoring non-winners as wild cards become the nine semifinalists who compete in three games, with no two players rematching each other in the semifinal round. The three semifinal winners advance to the two-day final round, in which contestants play two separate matches, with the contestants’ combined scores for both matches determining the champion.
By Larry Jensen, Director of Admissions
More and more families are considering non-public options for their children, primarily because of the smaller class sizes, the safe campuses, the excellent college preparation, and the access to extracurricular activities. The visit is often the first part of the process. These questions are among the most important to ask during that visit:
What will the first month/semester/year be like? You want to be able to anticipate any challenges so that you can plan for them. During your visit, try to schedule conversations with some of the people who will work directly with your child — teachers, coaches, administrators — so that you can gather the most accurate information possible.
How does the school communicate with parents? Will you hear from teachers only when something isn’t going well? Is the school reactive, or is it proactive? During the school year, your child spends more time with teachers than with any other adult, so it’s critical to have a good line of communication with professionals who know your child well.
What if my child has a hard time with the academics? How will the school help your child if he/she is struggling? What support mechanisms are in place? Are teachers accessible outside of regular class hours? Ask specific questions based on your child’s strengths and needs.
Is it easy to make friends in a school where the kids have been classmates for years? At a great school, faculty and staff focus on making sure that new students settle in well. Ask about how this happens. Will your child have an advisor? Are there clubs, sports and after-school activities that can help your child make friends?
What type of student excels in this school? Does the school value non-cognitive areas (kindness, curiosity, determination, etc.), or does the school seek to enroll only high academic achievers? The answer to this question will help you determine whether your child can thrive, rather than merely survive.
Asking lots of questions over several visits can inform parents and help them make the best educational choice for their children.
With the ever-changing landscape of education, it is important not only for educators, but also those in the community to pay attention to the trends and forces that influence and impact schools and students. Whether it means adding innovation to the core curriculum, rearranging learning spaces, individualizing instruction and/or collaborating to solve problems, these trends influence how learning happens. And external forces – political, economic, environmental, global, social, or technological – affect the focus and mindset of teachers and students.
Four words come to mind to help us understand where education is headed, how teachers share information and encourage thinking, and what students may need to do to ensure they are preparing for the future. These words are TIME, PLACE, PATH, and SPACE, as detailed in a recent issue of the Independent School Magazine. Many questions arise when considering these words within the context of the future of education. Do class periods have to be 45 minutes long? What is the appropriate length for a school year? What should schools look like? Where else can learning occur and still be considered school? How should a curriculum be shaped in order to be truly valuable?
To help answer these questions, Saint Stephen’s hosted an educational summit we called ALIVE: Assembling Leaders for an Innovative Vision of Education. The objective was to gather local thought leaders and harvest their ideas about what education could be. We felt that not only would SSES glean valuable information to influence its strategic thinking, but those attending would be able to take back the outcomes of these discussions to share within their communities.
We invited 18 leaders affiliated with area colleges, universities and schools, along with CEOs of businesses, experts in economics, child psychology, social advocacy, the arts, and researchers in science and technology. It was our hope that by bringing together people from a broad variety of disciplines, the discussion would be robust and approach key questions from different angles.
Although many were meeting for the first time, there was a common thread binding the group – everyone truly cares about children. The participants answered an array of questions in an effort to uncover the emerging forces/trends that our young people will face and how education can best be designed to help them thrive. The answers came without hesitation in an hour-long back and forth.
Participants were then asked to create the school of the future using simple props including popsicle sticks, straws, markers, cotton balls and glue. Through this activity, a variety of ways to present education, construct schools, and encourage student learning emerged.
The outcomes of the Q&A and design sessions uncovered a number of major themes. It is apparent that most feel education has never been in a greater state of change than it is today. Navigating different pathways of learning to meet individual needs is important and the structure of a program influences how much students gain from the experience. It is also clear that technology is a huge influence on how students learn. With so much knowledge at one’s fingertips, it is imperative that students are taught skills over content, that environments are created where students learn to problem solve, think critically and globally, and can navigate their own learning rather than just being receivers of information. The classroom should exist beyond the four walls of the school building.
There was much discussion about students being able to develop keen emotional intelligence to help them learn to be more adaptable in accepting and including others. Education must become more experiential with a hands-on approach that allows for exploration, and educators need to create a culture of constant creation and re-creation that allows students to collaborate with others, yet be grounded in who they are and what matters to them.
The time the group spent together went quickly, but the conversations were truly ALIVE! In capturing this “blue-sky” thinking about the future of education, we set forth on a path that we hope will eventually lead to a new blueprint for learning.
The Lower School’s countdown to Christmas 2017 included a daily “Kindness Calendar,” which taught students to be aware of and committed to acts of kindness. The instructions were as simple as, “Smile at somebody today.”
“We want them to learn how what they do and say impacts others and how small things can start a whole kindness chain,” Lower School Director Jennifer Helbing said. “We weave it through everything we do and it actually starts during the admission process. We tell families about our focus on the development of the whole child, and character development holds just as much significance as our academic lessons.”
Just as with the academic curriculum, Saint Stephen’s sees these learning opportunities as something foundational and built upon as students progress from division to division. Perhaps no time is more critical in teaching about kindness than the middle school years.
“They’re trying to figure out who they are as individuals. It’s a time when friendships are changing and it can be confusing when they’re moving away from each other. Navigating all of that is difficult,” Middle School Director Joel Erby said. “So we do a lot of things to help students remember that it’s okay to be nice, that it’s not taboo and it doesn’t make you soft or weak.”
One of the visible approaches Erby uses is a “Gratitude Tree,” which hangs prominently on a second-floor wall in the middle school building. Students add leaves to the tree with messages when they notice teachers or their peers being nice, kind or helpful to others. Each week at chapel services, Erby selects a handful of the leaves to read and recognizes the students publicly. During the opening weeks of school, the tree featured just a handful of notes. It now overflows.
While it might seem easy to dismiss the value of these types of exercises, the results can be significant, and the scientific data is plentiful. A recent Stanford University study showed that if you prioritize happiness, you will be more productive, creative, resilient, energized, charismatic and influential. Researchers conducted a series of studies that observed how witnessing kindness inspires kindness and causes it to spread.
Researchers in Great Britain directly related happiness to acts of kindness. Participants in the study were given a life satisfaction survey and then assigned randomly to one of three groups. One group was asked to perform a daily act of kindness for 10 days. A second group was instructed to do something new each day. The last group received no instructions. After the 10 days, the participants completed another life satisfaction survey and results showed that the individuals who practiced acts of kindness experienced a significant boost in their happiness.
Exhibiting kindness may have an even longer, more profound effect. Harvard and University of British Columbia researchers gave participants small sums of money and the choice to spend it on themselves or someone else. Two findings were observed. First, people in general felt happier when they were asked to remember a time they bought something for someone else. This happiness boost was the same regardless of whether the gift cost $20 or $100. The happier participants felt about their generosity, the more likely they were to spend on someone else instead of themselves.
Author, speaker and researcher Shawn Achor has demonstrated that if you perform random acts of kindness for two minutes a day for 21 days, you can retrain your brain to be more positive. Studies such as his show that when your brain is more positive you are more likely to be creative, intelligent and productive.
Even the most successful companies are recognizing the virtues of benevolence. Billionaire entrepreneur Mark Cuban was recently quoted saying, “Nice is way undervalued right now. It’s one of the most valuable assets out there.” Within the workforce, kindness towards one another can inspire employees to be more productive and make businesses more profitable, attributes that can translate to job success, wealth, healthy relationships and better health. The adage that success breeds happiness may be turning on its head.
“The goal for us as educators in independent schools is to help create great kids who not only are successful academically but have great character traits,” Erby said. “You want them to look back when they’re older and remember how they were treated here and realize that a lot of the things they learned about how to treat people with respect and kindness, those were ideas that were reinforced at Saint Stephen’s.”
The Saint Stephen’s Academic Team defended its Manatee County championship for the fourth consecutive year on Dec. 5, hosting and winning the final meet and the season title. SSES completed a dominant run, finishing the campaign with 938 total points. The 2nd-through-5th-place teams scored between 611 and 538 points. Three Falcons also topped the individual leaderboard – senior Jack Berry, juniors Matthew Thomas and Sidney Knowles (pictured) – and qualified to represent the county at state competition in April along with three students from public schools. Congratulations to all of the team members, including: Colton Melnick ’19, Maria Erquiaga ’20, Kassandra Haakman ’20, Mikayla Woodard ’20, Annie Class ’21, Tyler Katchen ’21, Connor McCray ’21, Jules Pung ’21, and Anusha Singh ’21.
Head of School Dr. Jan Pullen was recently profiled by Sarasota’s ABC 7 News in its weekly “Amazing Suncoast Woman” feature. Veteran reporter Linda Carson visited campus and talked with Dr. Pullen about her upbringing in Manatee County, her journey through education, and her 30 transformative years as a teacher and administrator at Saint Stephen’s Episcopal School. Dr. Pullen is a graduate of Manatee High School, Manatee Junior College, Florida State University, and the University of Pennsylvania. She has been a driving force in the emergence of Saint Stephen’s as one of the premier independent schools in Florida. Her message: “Never stop learning. Be a life-long learner. The world is full of new thoughts and ideas. Never shut your mind to them.”
Senior Vanessa Yan has been named a 2017 U.S. Presidential Scholar – one of only 161 nationwide. The White House Commission on Presidential Scholars selects students annually based on their academic success, essays, school evaluations and transcripts, as well as evidence of community service, leadership, and commitment to high ideals. Of the 3.5-million students expected to graduate from high school this year, more than 5,100 candidates qualified for the 2017 awards determined by outstanding performance on the SAT and ACT exams, through nominations made by Chief State School Officers, and other partner organizations. The 2017 U.S. Presidential Scholars are comprised of one young man and one young woman from each state, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico, and from U.S. families living abroad, as well as 15 chosen at-large. Vanessa, who is also one of the area’s top prep golfers and has led the Falcons with Top-30 individual finishes at each of the past three state tournaments, will attend Yale University.
Led by five SSES students, the Manatee County Academic Team represented the county in Orlando, April 27-29, at the state’s official academic competition – the Commissioner’s Academic Challenge sponsored by the Florida Department of Education. Throughout the fall, Manatee County high schools competed head-to-head in matches of 60 questions each. Questions covered all academic subjects, and students were awarded points for speed and accuracy. The top six students were invited to become members of the all-star county team. They practiced as a team throughout the spring in subjects such as math, history, and economics. This year’s team was comprised of Jack Lyons (Manatee High), MaryAnn Placheril (Saint Stephen’s), Alex Siegal (Saint Stephen’s), and Vanessa Yan (Saint Stephen’s), Jack Berry (Saint Stephen’s), and Matthew Thomas (Saint Stephen’s). Team Manatee got off to slow start at the Challenge, falling immediately into the consolation round, but they fought back through the bracket to reach the finals and ultimately finished sixth in the state in Division One, the largest classification in Florida. You can read more at the 2017 Academic Challenge website.
The Tampa Bay Business Journal/Niche.com has ranked Saint Stephen’s the No. 3 private K-12 school in the entire Tampa Bay area. Niche assessed 1,594 private schools throughout the country that offer grades kindergarten through 12th grade by looking at multiple metrics including test scores, percentage of seniors who go on to college, student-teacher ratio, and feedback from parents and students. Saint Stephen’s was given an A+ ranking and was listed behind only Tampa’s Berkeley Prep and Shorecrest Prep in St. Peterburg in the greater Tampa Bay area. You can view a complete list of the area rankings here.